Own My Growth

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Ego Complaining Is Futile


Everyone has an inherent tendency to take a position or a viewpoint on everything. If something is to our liking, we soak it in. If we feel something is not what we want it to be, we take a position. We complain.

There are two types of complaining we often indulge in.

The first one is egoic complaining. We do this only to let our own steam off and sate our ego. It is entirely self-centered and serves no purpose because it cannot bring about a change of any sort in the thing we are complaining about.

My son is slumped on the sofa watching a game of Cricket. I don’t like it, and I feel as if he is wasting his time. So I get all self-righteous and complain. “It’s late. Instead of wasting time, why can’t you do something more useful,” I say. I know my son will not stop watching the game because his favorite team is playing, and he has his plans. Here, I am complaining, unconsciously, with no purpose served.

In contrast, the second type of complaining is where we want a change to happen. This happens when we need to say something to bring about a change in the situation or person.

I am at a restaurant where I order soup. The steward places the bowl of soup in front of me, and it is warm. I want it hot, and it is not. I need to get my soup replaced. So I complain, ” I wanted my soup hot, and it is not. It is warm. Can you please have it served hot?”

Ego-fueled complaining is futile. It is negative and unproductive. I wish I could say that I don’t indulge in it. Unfortunately, that would be untrue. I have a lot of ground to cover.

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