Own My Growth

Helping folks with practical tips to manage themselves better

Peace Is What We Desire


When we think of stress in the context of a physical object, it comes from opposing forces that act on the object. Imagine a rope being pulled in two opposite directions; it is under stress.

As individuals, stress happens when we have a desire for something, and we have to contend with choices that are at odds with and potentially incompatible with what we desire.

  • You want to relax, but there is a significant backlog of work that beckons you to be hard at work. ” If I don’t complete this, my boss will call me out, or my growth will be compromised.” 
  • You want to catch up with your cousins, but there is an exam you need to prepare for. “All my friends are having fun, and I am stuck with this work.”
  • You want to feel secure in your job, but the people around you make you feel like you are not good enough. “My boss is not communicating with me; it means she is not happy with what I am doing.”

Going back to the rope analogy, how does the stress on the rope go away? When one side or both sides pulling at the rope, let go.

It’s the same for us. Our mind is constantly creating stress for us by being paranoid and anxious about situations we encounter in our day to day life. The tension comes from the incompatible choices playing an invisible tug of war in our minds.

Like in the physical world, when we give up our attachment to choices we grapple within our minds, we experience a sense of release from the stress.

At The Core, What We Desire Is Peace

The opposite of stress is peace. When we say we don’t want to be stressed, we are saying we want peace. 

Peace from the warring thoughts in our head causing the stress.

We can never attain peace by “doing” or “thinking” something. By definition, being at peace implies a Zen state where our mind is not grappling with the flurry of incompatible thoughts. Peace comes from a sense that everything is fine and not giving any energy to our mind’s stressful chatter.

Unfortunately, you can’t “work” your way to peace. 

Peace comes from a state of understanding-Knowing and accepting a situation for what it is.

“I don’t need to seek validation from my boss. I know that I am giving my best, and the work I am doing is creating value for the organization. I’ll continue giving my best.”

“This is a crucial phase for me. I can always have fun with my friends later.”

“I am feeling jaded. A lot of the work on my plate is not relevant. I will do it at my own pace. I will take the break without feeling guilty.”

Naval Ravikant is someone I follow actively. He puts it nicely, “Peace is Happiness at rest, and Happiness is Peace in motion.”

When you are naturally in a state of peace, whatever it is, you will be happy doing it. Similarly, if you are in a happy state, if you were to sit in silence without doing anything, you would be in peace. There will be no buzz of thoughts creating a false narrative in your head that you have to do something.

Cultivate acceptance to reduce your stress and bring in peace. Because peace is what your are seeking.

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