Be Willing To Say The Hard Thing

When most people walk into a difficult conversation, they default to platitudes. They say everything politically correct. Everyone leaves feeling okay. And nothing actually improves.

This is selfish.

The person on the receiving end needs honesty and gets comfort instead. The problem remains unsolved. The gap stays unaddressed. Both people walk away having protected their feelings at the expense of the outcome.

Most of us got conditioned this way from childhood. Soften the message. Don’t upset people. Be careful with how you say things. And so we grow up preferring feedback that feels good over feedback that is accurate.

But if you filter feedback through how it makes you feel rather than whether it is true, you rob yourself of the chance to get better.

Good happens when people are willing to say the hard thing. And when they are willing to hear it.