Good Communication-The Burden Is Always On You

You have a request of your colleague, and he does not take your request seriously. You may think that your colleague is the unhelpful variety, whereas the root of the issue could be the way you conveyed your message and how he processed your request for help. 

A younger colleague comes to you asking for your input on the presentation she is working on. You give the inputs. She comes back to share version two of the presentation, and it feels as if she ignored all of your earlier inputs. You think your younger colleague is dense, whereas your convoluted and confusing inputs could be the core issue.

Good communication is at the core of all good relationships and people to people interactions. But unfortunately, many of us sometimes struggle with effective communication because we think, “I am responsible for what I said but not for what you understood.” 

While this may be sound logical, this is not how good communication works. When you are in a conversation with someone, you must consider the other person’s emotional state and choose your words carefully to convey the message you want to give. The burden of understanding your message may be on the other person, but the responsibility to present your message in the most appropriate way is always on you.  

Clear communication involves understanding the emotional state of your listener-Is the person distracted and preoccupied?- and then choosing the most effective words to say what you want to say, in a tone and body language that is in sync with the message you wish to convey.

Stephen Covey said it brilliantly on how to be effective in any communication – Seek first to understand and then to be understood.