Your Fear Is Proportional To The Importance You Attach
April 6, 2022
There is an important sales pitch coming up. The deal is significant and will have a big impact on the trajectory of my business. I am tensed, and all sorts of negative chatter is happening in my head. What if I screw up? After I present the solution, what if the prospect is not impressed? What if I make a mistake?
I have encountered this situation a few times, and I have tried to figure out why I feel stressed or fearful when something that I think to be important is coming up.
I have realized that the answer is in the question- Our fear is usually proportional to how important something is.
If the deal were a small one, I would not feel anything. However, it is because the deal is important that I have a sense of fear.
We all value what feels important, what feels meaningful. Unfortunately, the problem is the more meaningful something is for us, the more we care about it. And, the more we care about it, the more we are afraid to lose it, afraid of screwing it up. Our fear is proportional to how important the potential consequence of our action is.
Paradoxically, one unintended consequence of our fear is that we get stuck in the loop of procrastination- in matters that are most significant. As a result, we keep putting off doing what is required and instead lose ourselves trying to improve what’s already there or waiting for that right time !!
There is a simple mantra to deal with this predicament- Learn to use your fear as a motivator. If something scares you, it’s a signal that you should probably go ahead and do it anyhow. Because, the thing that is worrying you is actually important for you.